The question
I get the most is "What is it like to be a mom?" And I usually say something like "it's
exhausting, but it's awesome!" which is 100 percent true, but what is that
really telling you about motherhood? I
remember being terrified before my daughter was born, in my mind people who
became parents had a special set of skills (insert Liam Neeson voice), and at
the time my skills included memorizing all the words to "Back that thang
up" on the first try. Clearly I was
in trouble, so I sought out advice from every person I could find. Relatives,
friends, even strangers became sort of a pseudo parenting council that I could
bounce questions off of when needed.
Recently I
thought about all the advice that I had received while I was pregnant, (swaddle/
don’t swaddle, don’t co-sleep, put some cereal in that milk) and how much of it
was really helpful? The one piece of
advice that came up constantly was to “sleep when the baby sleeps” because new
moms need lots of rest. Hey now, I’m all
for it, but do you know how most babies sleep?
They don’t get up at the end of a long day and say “Well I’m beat, think
I’m gonna turn in for the night (yawn)” Hell no, they sleep at 11am, 2pm, 7pm,
etc etc etc. If you can keep up with
that, then God bless you, but it made me crazy!
I couldn’t get anything done. So
instead of sleeping when the baby slept I used that time to do laundry, cook,
clean, basically whatever I wanted to do for my spirit. And yes I was tired A.F., but I was getting
shit done which made me feel good.
So no, I
will no longer tell new moms to “sleep when the baby sleeps”; instead I will
tell them to do whatever makes them feel good.
I will tell them to lean on their spouse, family, and friends. I will tell them to accept casseroles when
they’re too tired to cook, and invitations to babysit when their just too damn
tired. To fold the clothes that same
day, or next week, or whenever the hell you want. Because at the end of the day this journey you’re
on is all about protecting your new mama spirit, loving on that baby, and
crushing this thing called life, 1000 percent.
Disclaimer: I know 1000 is not a
percentage, I’m extra..lmao.
